The Northern Light

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A Kenny for your Thoughts: PDA

Mackenzie Brey, Social Media Manager

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Picture it. You’re walking down a hallway, inhaling the overpowering smell of body odor and hope. You see a hunky football star wobbling down the hall with his eyes gorilla-glued onto the backside of his girlfriend. He sneaks up behind her, grabbing her, all-but knocking her over, then plants a kiss on her that you’re sure you will never be able to wipe your mind clean of. The two, completely unaware of the spectacle they’ve made, walk off into the science wing never to be seen again, hand in hand, waffle style of course. Your only question… “Am I scarred?”

Of course you are. You have been hit with the terrifying and life altering sighting of P.D.A., and let me tell you if you haven’t been told before…it’s NASTY! It’s one thing to share a casual hug after school, maybe even a smooch or two, but good God what possess a person to have to round all four bases all while gathering up books for third hour? I’m not asking much ladies and gents but let’s try to keep the fondling and groping to a minimum. Wait until you’re in the comfort of your own home to quite literally attack each other. Now look, I understand that you just want to “be there” and “comfort” each other, but right before my eyes? No thank you.

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4 Comments

4 Responses to “A Kenny for your Thoughts: PDA”

  1. Demi Jensen on March 6th, 2018 11:41 am

    One of your funniest articles Kenny :))

  2. meredith ablao on March 6th, 2018 11:47 am

    Nice, this is funny. I like this! Although, this has great potential to be longer. I get the effect though.
    Good work 🙂

  3. cameron myers on March 6th, 2018 12:09 pm

    This really entertained me. Every couple should know PDA is absolutely nasty, and they way you phrased every single sentence makes this article really true and funny at the same time.

  4. Lily Antor on March 6th, 2018 1:21 pm

    This is too real. You’re so funny Kenny!

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